How to Win Friends and Influence People


RATING: 9.9 of 10.0

OVERVIEW: Designed to teach you to improve your overall happiness by improving your ability to communicate.

This book is one of the greatest books of all time.  Dale Carnegie is the son of the famous industrialist and philanthropist, Andrew Carnegie.  Andrew Carnegie may possibly have been one of the wealthiest men to ever live.

Re-reading the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People” was more insightful this time around  This book opened my eyes to the importance of relationships and its role in a successful business, social, and family life.  I rank Carnegie’s book one step below canonized scripture.  If I had the influence, I would recommend this reading to every businessperson, high school student, and individual whose success relies on relationships.

It is strong encourage you to read this book over and over.  Share it with as many people as you can.  This book, if applied appropriately, could be one of the best gifts you ever offer.

My Notes:

***”You can never win an argument.” 

  • Why?  Because “one convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.”

“Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of him.”

  • Until you accept the fact that everyone has qualities that you need to learn, you will never have the humility sufficient to be a continual learner.

Persuasion: the ability to drive an eager desire.

  • The art of storytelling will get you far in life

A dog is the perfect example of a friend. The only animal that makes a living by being your friend

  • How do dogs do that?

Become genuinely interested in others and then you will gain friends

  • If you want to end a conversation, strictly talk about yourself
  • Encourage others to talk about themselves
  • Use open ended questions to help people talk about themselves

“A smile costs nothing but enriches those who receive it”

  • “People are as happy as they make their minds up to be” President Abraham Lincoln


  • I can’t stress how much power comes in hearing your name
  • I recommend using someone’s name 3 times the when you’re first introduced to someone
  • Never avoid a chance to use someone’s name

Do you talk to customers on the phone?  Smile when you talk to them.

  • It is proven that smiling on the phone will improve the quality of a call
  • People can feel your happy when you smile
  • Try being upset and smiling at the same time

Admit you’re wrong emphatically

  • Express slowly and clearly that you’re wrong
  • Admit your mistakes before anyone else can

*Influencing People and Winning Friends requires “Yes, yes, yes”

  • When trying to convince or make a sale, first, ask 3 questions that you know they’ll say ‘YES’ to.
  • Avoid all answers that will result in a ‘no’
  • When you’re on a streak of saying ‘yes’ you don’t want to stop

*Let others see their irrational behavior by letting them talk and talk

  • This principle is so true, no one can sound smart if you let them talk long enough

A good teacher teaches you and a great teacher helps you teach yourself

  • Anytime I learn something on my own I feel more desire to remember and follow it

You must lather a man before you shave him

  • Translation: before you seek to criticize, seek to empathize.

Please respond, if you’ve read the book or want to share your thoughts, insights, and anything that stands out to you.

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